How balanced does life feel right now?
When we think about feeling centred, we might align this with feeling happy.
When all our ducks are in a row
When life is ticking along nicely
When we feel a sense of peace.
If life feels like it’s where it needs to be for you right now, that’s genuinely awesome.
But for many people, life is a constant struggle between eating the “right” things, finding time for exercise, making space to see friends, keeping up with what’s “trending”, putting in the hours at work, all whilst trying to keep your living space tidy, putting family first and everything else in between. It’s exhausting. And if it involves a fear or anxiety about what might happen if you take a step forward, you can end up taking a step back.
This is why the theory of happiness is so interesting. Many people think happiness is those bursts of joy we experience, like when we win money on a scratch card or someone you like texts you back.
In fact there are two types of happiness – Eudaemonic (the feelings we get when we help others) and Hedonic. Hedonic happiness gets a bad rep because often people associate it with guilty pleasures (like “over-indulging”).
But happiness authors now say you need a bit of both. Yes it matters that we feel we are contributing meaningfully to life, but it also matters that we treat ourselves when we feel we’ve achieved something.
This week, set the intention to Bring the Balance. Write a list of three things you’ve achieved in the last week/last month/last year (one for each if you want). What’s different now that you’re proud of? It might be your job, a new friendship, something you’ve written or drawn, a book you’ve read, a new hobby you’ve tried. When you see how far you’ve come, then make a note of how you’ll reward yourself for each. It might be a self-care treat, a meal out with someone who matters, or curling up watching a favourite movie. It all counts. Recognise your fears, and balance this with your hopes and dreams, including an aspiration to take good care of yourself. (Don’t forget these self-care cards you can download and print to create your own top tips.)
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Copyright Delphi Ellis 2019