How do you feel about asking for help?
I think, if we’re being honest, there’s a vulnerability in it.
When we reach out to someone, it means letting them see we have a need. It means letting go of the fear about what they might think of us. It also means opening up to the reality that they might reject us, or fall short. It’s not easy when you realise the ones you need to care, don’t care the way you need. But you still have a right to ask.
We can also probably admit it seems much easier to offer help, than to ask for it. We might actually find it harder to follow our own advice, yet feel frustrated when those we give it to, don’t follow it.
In this week’s Mojo Moment video, Amanda Palmer explains the power of connection through asking, and how actually when you find your crowd you will always feel held and supported.
Here’s what might help:
This week, maybe set the intention to Ask The Crowd. You might start by defining who your crowd is – or who you’d like them to be – before deciding what you need from them. Friendships aren’t always easy, and as we get older, it’s definitely harder to make them. But that doesn’t mean there aren’t people out there who will align with your values and be there when you need. Whether it’s writing a blog, setting up a social media page or joining online forums, focus on your interests and see who comes along (it goes without saying, stay safe online).
If you’ve identified a need recently, see who you know who can help you. In the video below, Amanda Palmer explains how people with like-minded interests – even those you don’t know that well – can help your needs be met, when connection is driving the moment. If it’s something more personal, you might join a support group, or ask your doctor if there are safe spaces locally where people can meet. (Here is a list of links to organisations that might be useful.) Remember if people reject or judge you just because you asked for help, they’re probably not your people. Keep your circle healthy, and may your crowd nourish you in those moments of need.
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Copyright Delphi Ellis