How are you at singing your own praises?
I’ll start. My new book, Answers in the Dark made it to #1 in the Hot New Releases, and it reached #3 as a Best Seller in one of its categories, on publication day (27/5/22). But, let me be clear, my confidence hasn’t always been that way.
I distinctly remember some time ago, for example, being asked what I do well (eg., at interview), and would play it down for fear of looking arrogant. Can you relate?
For many of us, it can feel “wrong” to point people towards what we are good at; to say “look at me” when we want to be recognised for our accomplishments. It’s also fair to say we are probably so focused on making sure everyone else gets ahead, that the very idea of putting our hat in the ring feels alien to us.
Here’s what might help:
This week, maybe set the intention to Wave Your Flag. Ok, Jubilee Fever might be setting in a little this end (the bunting is already up), but stick with me. This concept is about not being afraid to claim your territory for what you do well. This article offers some tips including how to dress to express.
The next time you find yourself in a meeting, round the dinner table with friends, or networking in some way, where you have an opportunity to showcase your strengths, just take a deep breath and go for it; fake it until you make it. If it feels uncomfortable, that’s ok; stretching your comfort zone is going to make you feel a bit wibbly for a while. But as Pamela Druckerman once said “Everyone is winging it, some just do it more confidently”.
And if someone pays you a compliment and says “you look lovely in that top” instead of saying “oh this old thing?”, get used to saying “thank you, that’s kind of you to say”. Because you’re allowed to accept the nice things, and as often as you can.
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