What’s in your way right now?
In a world that’s focused on moving forward (and increasingly at pace) you may have noticed things have felt more…complicated. Obstacles present themselves where we least expect; people are unnecessarily difficult and, sometimes we even get in our own way:
say yes when we mean no
or avoid when we want to dive in.
If we take procrastination as one example, we know now this is a form of perfectionism – setting punishing objectives and striving for flawlessness is a sure path to discomfort. As a result, we end up taking imperfect actions to deal with the difficulty.
Some things are easier to manoeuvre of course. We might placate to keep the peace, or we write another to-do list to set us back on track. But when it’s our mojo that’s blocked, if creativity has disappeared or we can’t see the wood for the trees sometimes we need a little more.
This week, maybe set the intention to Clear the Path. When tackling your to-do list, remember Eisenhower’s Principle: the difference between urgent and important. Important is what gets us where we want to be; urgent usually means someone else wants to make their problems (or goals) ours. This article offers tips on how to use the principle helpfully.
If it’s your own expectations that create a block, remember that good enough is enough; the relentless pursuit of perfectionism can be rooted in a fear of failure. So be compassionate with yourself, knowing we’re all just doing what we can, with what we have from where we are – and that’s ok.
When other people are the obstacles, sometimes the only thing that helps is creating space between you. You can set the tone by articulating the boundary of what’s ok (and what’s not) and creating space between you when someone keeps crossing the line; it’s ok to say “enough” when something – or someone – is not good for you. Hard conversations by definition are never easy, but that doesn’t mean they’re not worth having. Go at your pace, and take the next step when you’re ready.
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