Recently in my classes, I’ve been talking a lot about “common humanity” – this is a term used to explain that around the world there are two things that unite us all:
• We all want to be happy
• We all want to be free from pain
I believe in this, because I haven’t met a single person yet who wakes up in the morning and says “I hope I’m miserable today”.
The problem we have is that sometimes it’s the very efforts we make to be happy, or to avoid pain, that leads to greater difficulty.
We lash out when we need to be still.
We withdraw when we need to connect.
We get frustrated or worried when we think people should be doing more, or less.
We label our – or their – feelings as right or wrong, good or bad, positive or negative.
And ultimately, we realise none of that helps at all.
So here’s what I’m not going to do:
I’m not going to suggest you remain calm.
I’m not going to advise you take a break from the news.
I’m not going to spout anything other than whatever you’re feeling right now, it’s valid.
What I am going to make a point of saying is, I hear you.
If you’re frustrated or scared that people should be doing more or less, it matters.
If you want things to be better, that’s important.
If you wish things weren’t as they are, it counts.
And most importantly, you’re not alone.
We’re in this together.
If you want to set an intention for the week, it could be this: Feel the Feels. Allow what you’re feeling to exist in this moment. Write a journal. Rip up a magazine. Mindfully punch a pillow if it helps. Cry. Lean into the feeling – because it’s there anyway – and if it feels safe to do so, give it some air. If it’s helpful, I’ve included a link to a free guided meditation with instructions here.
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Copyright Delphi Ellis 2020