Monday Mojo – Dress for the Party

Do you remember “Sunday Best”?

Those clothes we kept just for Sunday School. A relative’s china that stayed in the cupboard for “special days”.  That bottle of bubbly in preparation for the day we get some good news.

Many of of us are raised to keep things for when something important happens. But the thing is, something important happens for most of us every day. We wake up.

We often approach the day with good intentions. But do we fully appreciate the fact that we bring something special to the world just by being in it?  That life is the special occasion.

This week, set the intention to Dress for the Party. Grab your favourite dress, shoes or handbag and let it see the light of day.  Let your “Sunday best” reach its potential by showing your friends and colleagues there is something to celebrate –  being alive, in this amazing world of ours. Wear something fancy. Let your hair down.  And put on your dancing shoes.  

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©️ Delphi Ellis

Monday Mojo – Boast a Little

When was the last time you blew your own trumpet?

Spoke of your achievements.
Fluffed your own feathers.
Raised a glass to yourself.

Feels weird doesn’t it? Maybe even awkward and uncomfortable.

It might depend on what you see as success though. For some people just getting out of bed is an accomplishment. For others, it’s turning a profit, getting “likes” on a Facebook post, or being married for a number of years. There are no rights or wrongs, the measure of success is a personal thing.

But whatever it is, we’re programmed to see “boasting” as wrong; speaking proudly of what we’ve achieved is usually received negatively.  But that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t do it. (Last week’s Mojo was all about ‘Breaking the Rules’).  This article even discusses the benefits of bragging.

So, this week set the intention to Boast a Little. Think of one thing you’re most proud of this year. It can be anything from saving some money, being there for a friend when they needed you, or treating yourself to some well-deserved time off.  Tell a friend or colleague and then ask them what they’re proud of too. And if you’re nervous about doing this, watch the video below, to gain some momentum.

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©️ Delphi Ellis 2018

Monday Mojo – Break The Rules

When was the last time you broke the rules?

I don’t mean the law; I’m talking about those ‘rules’  which make life restrictive.

The ones that include the word “should”.  The ones that leave us feeling unfulfilled. The ones that make life a bit, well…dull. And the ones that, in all seriousness, can create more harm than good.

Whatever you think of the Royal Family, you’d be hard pressed to miss the positive impact that particularly Kate, William and Harry have had on discussions around mental health.  But have you noticed it’s because they’re not following protocol? The media recently reported that when a widow started to talk about suicide to the Duke of Sussex, during the tour of Australia,  his entourage said it was time to move on. He said “no”.

This matters.

It opened a conversation about mental health. It raised awareness of suicide and those left behind. And by breaking the rules, he changed them.

This week, set the intention to Break the Rules. Work out what’s holding you back in life, and who wrote your rules. Are you standing in your own way, or have you been passed down a rule book that just doesn’t make any sense any more? Think about your shoulds, and see if they’re stopping you from achieving your goals.  And if the rules of the game can be changed, play it to your advantage. 

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©️Delphi Ellis

Monday Mojo – Find Your Wings

Are you a busy bee?

The nature of the world we currently live in, is an expectation to fly at a 100 miles per hour, every day of the week. We wake up, get up, and zoom off; our feet hit the ground and away we go. Then, before we know it, it’s time for bed. Our head hits the pillow and thoughts buzz around our minds until eventually we doze off. If we’re not busy, then we’re being lazy. At least, that’s what society seems to think.

The thing about bees, is that they are hard workers. They’re known for looking out for each other and working together to keep things moving along. They have meaning. They add value. But unlike bees, sometimes – when us humans are so busy – we can lose sight of our purpose, and why we got up at all.   The good news is, we can still be busy and effective. This article from Ted says it doesn’t matter how old you are, you can always discover your calling. 

This week, set the intention to Find Your Wings. Over the next few days, spend time thinking about why you’re on the path you’re on. Where are you going? What gets you out of bed in the morning, why are you working so hard? Once you know your purpose, everything else falls in to place. And if you find you’re losing your way, remember there will be others around you who can steer you back on to the right path.

According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way that a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its little body off the ground. The bee, of course flies anyway. Because bees  don’t care what humans think is impossible.
> Bee Movie

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©️ Delphi Ellis 2018

Monday Mojo – Avoid the Normal

Do you sometimes feel like you hold a piece of yourself back?

From friends.
From colleagues.
From the rest of the world.

When we meet someone new, it seems normal to censor what we say, to keep just a piece of ourselves hidden, so that we don’t give too much away. Not because we’re hiding anything, but because sometimes it’s just easier to try to fit in.

We strive to keep up with the crowd.  We want to be good enough. We reach for the ‘normal’ to be liked. Loved. Accepted.

The only thing is, and as Matt Haig quite rightly pointed out, there are 7 billion versions of normal on this planet so it’s no wonder it’s exhausting striving for perfection.

Possibility starts with the little things, by doing something different every day.

This week, set the intention to Avoid the Normal.  Try something that stretches your comfort zone.  Consider a new hobby, or reveal your ‘quirky’ side in conversation that might surprise a few people. Whether it’s telling your colleagues about your secret Rick Astley collection, or voicing your opinion on something close to your heart, plan what you can say that shows you just as you are.  Take a deep breath and remember, you have every right to bring all of you in to the conversation.

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©️ Delphi Ellis 2018

World Mental Health Day – Conversations Start Journeys

10th October is World Mental Health Day, and the focus this year for me is very much that Conversations Start Journeys.

Taking the time to talk to someone and find out how they are can be transformative and healing. Taking an interest in how someone is, can help them feel like they matter.

According to the Campaign to End Loneliness, feelings of loneliness can be as dangerous as to our health as smoking 15 cigarettes a day, with our mental health and loneliness intrinsically linked. So, why not reach out to someone today and find out how they are?

https://youtu.be/-rDaL2bzHac

According to the Mental Health Foundation, we get asked “How are you?” up to 14 times a week, but only mean “I’m fine” 19% of the time. For that reason, Time to Change suggests you #AskTwice.

Their suggestions around mental health and opening conversations also include:

  • Take it seriously
  • Listen and reflect
  • Ask questions
  • Don’t try and fix it
  • Build your knowledge.
  • You might also find the contact details below helpful.
  • Keep the conversation going, and be part of the journey.
  • ©️ Delphi Ellis 2018
  • Monday Mojo – Start a Conversation

    How are you?  And by that, I mean how are you really?

    It’s a crucially important question, and one I deeply believe in. Because, you see, when people just ask us how we are, we usually say “I’m fine”.

    But we’re not always fine are we?

    And sometimes, we feel like we’re burdening people, if we say what’s on our minds. But, even so, it’s good to have an outlet. 

    This Wednesday 10th October, it’s World Mental Health Day.  My theme for this year is “Conversations Start Journeys”.  It promotes the idea that in order to get to the heart of what we’re going through, we have to start somewhere – it might just be with one genuine question or one honest answer. No expectations. No solutions. But also no filters.

    This week, set the intention to Start a Conversation.  Make a list of people you trust, and take the decision to talk to them when you need. It doesn’t have to be today, but make a promise to yourself to talk about things when events take their toll. Don’t be afraid to say how you’re feeling – you feel what you feel – and if that makes some people uncomfortable, find people you can speak your truth with.  And, if you’re worried about someone else, make space for them to talk too; ask them how they are and be sure to ask twice, just in case.

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    ©️ Delphi Ellis 2018

    Monday Mojo – Honour Your Time

    What’s taking up your time lately?

    It’s one of our most precious commodities, time. You can invest it, but you can’t own it. We can spend it, but we can’t get a refund. We can waste it, but we can’t stop it. We move through every day trying to make the most of it, and yet somehow we always feel like there’s never enough, and wish we had more of it.

    How do you decide what gets your time, and who gets your energy? We worry about wasting time especially if it’s spent on ourselves. But the key to taking care of others is taking care of yourself.

    This week, set the intention to Honour Your Time. Make conscious decisions over the next few days about where you are investing your time, and whether it’s where matters most. Consider your time to be as precious as your most valued possession which you wouldn’t give away to just anyone. And when you know how you’re going to spend it, make it count.

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    ©️ Delphi Ellis

    Monday Mojo – Ride the Waves

    Have you noticed how, sometimes, change comes out of nowhere?

    You’ll be doing your own thing, minding your own business and, wallop! Someone or something blindsides you, and suddenly everything is different. Sometimes forever.

    We don’t usually plan for this type of change; it’s so unexpected that we couldn’t possibly have seen it coming.

    But like a boat on the ocean, you’re built to last. You have everything you need to cope with the challenges you face, even if there are days when it feels like you haven’t.

    This week, set the intention to Ride the Waves. Allow yourself a moment to experience life as it is. Appreciate your 100% success rate at surviving so far, in every challenge you’ve faced. Try a technique like mindfulness, to help you manage your emotions when things get tough. Build up your resilience by eating and sleeping well, and talk about what’s on your mind. And then go with the flow, travel the journey knowing that you have everything you need to keep going.

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    ©️ Delphi Ellis

    Monday Mojo – Find the Quiet

    Have you noticed how noisy the world is lately?

    If you’ve travelled on a train lately you’ll know what I mean. People compete to be heard, by speaking louder and louder. They talk on their ‘phones and clatter the keyboards on their laptops. And to drown out the house, people plug into their headphones, ironically listening to more sound to calm the noise from the outside world.

    We use sound as a coping mechanism.

    When I’m teaching my listening skills workshops, attendees recognise that we fill silences because they’re, well, uncomfortable. We avoid the quiet because we simply don’t like it. The quietness means we might feel something. Or have to confront something. But there is peace to be found in the silences.

    This week, set the intention to Find the Quiet. Create a space at home, or somewhere you can call a sanctuary, where you can retreat when you need it. Let the silence guide you. Allow the peace and quiet to refresh you. Give yourself permission to reset, recharge and then carry on.

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    ©️ Delphi Ellis

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