You make a difference to the world, just by being in it. Recognise the contribution you make in your friendships, relationships, at work and at home. Remember how far you have come and the courage you have shown, to get where you are. You are amazing. Every day.
Subscribe for regular, personalised and positive mojo to your inbox and receive exclusive access to the Members Area which contains free videos, guides and MP3’s for you to view.
He saw a trainer nearby and asked why these animals just stood there, making no attempt to get away. “Well,” the trainer said, “when they were very young, much smaller, we used the same sized rope to tie them; at that age, it was enough to hold them. As they grew up, they are conditioned to believe they cannot escape. They believe the rope can still hold them, so they never try to break free.”
This story got me thinking about what holds us back. Why, when we can go wherever we choose, do we stay where we are? Letting go can seem really difficult, especially if it’s associated with change or painful memories. But can we just decide one day to break free from the things that stop us moving forward. What’s holding you back?
Here is some food for thought:
1) Have a think about what’s holding you back. Is it time, money, energy, memories or other people? Write a list (if it helps) of what it is that’s keeping you stuck.
2) Think about the benefits of holding on to those things. If it’s the past, your thoughts or negative people, consider what you gain by holding on to them.
3) Create a plan of where you want to be and how you can get there through positive action. Do you need to have a conversation with someone, where you can assertively say what you need without conflict arising? If the past is dominating your present, consider what steps you can take to move forward in a way you find healthy and helpful. You may find techniques like mindfulness useful, for keeping your thinking in the here and now Ask for help, if it’s difficult to manage on your own.
As Jon Kabat-Zinn said, wherever you go, there you are.
Receive Sparkle direct to your inbox, a regular slice of positive mojo containing feel good vibes. You’ll also receive up to 30% discount on published website prices as well as exclusive access to the members area containing free guides, mp3’s and videos. Click here to sign up.
The story goes that the tortoise and the hare were in a race. The hare, a very confident and somewhat noisy fellow (so we’re told), decided he could sit back and wait until the last possible minute to cross the finish line. He felt, because the tortoise was so slow, there was no chance his competition would win. Unfortunately for the hare, he dozed off under a tree whilst waiting, and so he lost the race.
This childhood fable reminds us that it’s not always those you’d expect to win – the extroverts – who succeed, and it challenges us to consider whether it’s always the confident, loudest, fastest people who get ahead. Not only did the tortoise win, but his message to keep going even in the face of adversity, offered motivation for us all. In her book Quiet, Susan Cain explains that introverts can succeed just as well, quoting Albert Einstein and JK Rowling as two examples. (There’s more about this in my next newsletter).So what does winning mean to you – what would it look like? I’d love to hear what you think.
* We may associate winning with being loud and confident but, as I’ve described above, you don’t have to be noisy to get your own way. If you’re finding assertive conversations difficult either at work or at home, you could try preparing a list of things you want to say or the points you want to make, by writing them down and practicing them, perhaps with a friend before hand.
* Knowing what you want in life to help you succeed can be hard, especially if things have been difficult for so long. Spend an hour imagining what life would look like if you were ‘successful’, to help you get in touch with what success means for you. Start writing a ‘to do’ list – make sure you add some timescales to help you make it happen. Ask for help, if you’re still not sure.
* Something like 50% of the population are introverts – if you’re someone who needs some time out, schedule this in your diary each week, whether it’s to read a book or just sit under a tree – it’s okay to be quiet! Every winner has scars, so whether you’d describe yourself as an extrovert or an introvert, everyone has fought quite a battle to get where they are. Time out is important though, so if you’re feeling the strain, make sure you schedule time to relax as often as possible.
Subscribe for your own slice of positive mojo straight to your inbox and receive exclusive access to videos, mp3s and other cool resources in the members area.
Susan Cain talks about the Power of Introverts at a TED conference.
Blog Featured Image courtesy of Warner Bros